|One of my MOM's sent me this...way to cute. I can vouch for a lot of these. |
This is to Santa from a Mommy!
I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled mychildren on demand, visited the doctor's office more than my doctor and soldsixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree onthe school playground. I was hoping you could spread my list out overseveral Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my son's redcrayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.
Here are my Christmas wishes:
I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache (in any color, except purple,which I already have) and arms that don't hurt or flap in the breeze,but are strong enough to pull my screaming child out of the candy aislein the grocery store.
I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine some where in the seventhmonth of my last pregnancy.
If you're hauling big ticket items this year I'd like fingerprintresistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music, a television thatdoesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals, and a refrigerator with a secretcompartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone.
On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, "Yes,Mommy" to boost my parental confidence, along with two kids who don't fight and three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without, the use of power tools. I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting "Don't eat inthe living room" and "Take your hands off your brother," because my voiceseems to be just out ofmy children's hearing range and can only be heard by the dog.
If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enoughtime to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or theluxury of eating foodwarmer than room temperature without it being served in a Styrofoamcontainer.
If you don't mind, I could also use a few Christmas miracles tobrighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely. It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family. Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is calling and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the door and come in and dry off so you don't catchcold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leavecrumbs on the carpet. You promised me last year you would lose someweight with me so nextyear you and I could be a cute size two blonde...ok, some requests go too far, but none the less...
P.S. One more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep mychildren, healthy, safe and of course, young enough to always believein Santa.
*Santa has asked that this gets passed on to all the mommies you know*
On another note. The girls did the funniest thing today. I sat in the recliner and for about 30 minutes they chased each other around the chair laughing and giggling. Then, if one fell and started crawling...the other would get down on the floor and start crawling too. I wish i had had my video camera but i didn't. I know if i had gotten up to get it they would have stopped...so i didn't. Instead, i just sat here and enjoyed the first of many many days and YEARS of my twins playing together like the precious little babies they are...soo cute!
Also, i took the girls with me to take Hannah to school today. GOSH, i really have NO IDEA how i'm going to manage every Tue & Thur. taking all 3 to school. I'd love any suggestions anyone may have? Right now i get one out of the car...carry her around to the other side and hold both at once...then what do i do with Hannah? Luckily today, her bf Maddy came in with her Grammy at the same time...so Hannah held Maddy's hand and her grandma had picked up one of the girls...i ended up taking her and carrying both in whild Maddy's grammy walked in with H & M! It's ok to do this...but what do i do when Maddy's not at school? UGH!
Other than that Paul & I are celebrating our "Engagement & Dating Anniversary" tomorrow night. We have a sitter and we're going to go to Americas for dinner. I'm SOOO excited since we haven't been there in a few years. The last time we had planned to go was for my bday 2 years ago but i was prego and still so sick we had to cancel.
1 month ago